Noktyoul
We live where they died. The ruins we have built our cities upon are of unfathomable size— beyond what any of our kind could ever dream of constructing— and yet their creators were felled by our might. Their land is ours now, and with it— their secrets.Noktyoul is a sunny island nation along the northwestern corner of Rqet, built upon the bones of cities constructed by the ancient race who once lived there— who were wiped out by the Xholx who founded the nation to fulfill an ancient prophecy.
The Words of Worms
When humans wither and crack under the punctured sun, a strange instrument will be heard over the horizon. Follow it— take to the seas— and we will find ourselves a new home where cities of untold age lie.This is the beginning of Noktyoul's history, though it is not the beginning for that of the Xholx— which offers important context. Before this, the Xholx had been a nomadic group occupying the infamous badlands within the continent of Lqet. Water and food were scarce, and thus they had warred with other groups in the badlands over even the smallest of oases throughout their history. This continued until they met one whose might matched their own, the Lighst, who defeated them during what is known as the Battle of Sand— as it was fought over what was thought to be a spring but turned out to be no more than a puddle— which evaporated by the time the fighting was over. While the Lighst had won, they still did not have enough water for themselves, yet alone enough to subjugate the Xholx— and instead demanded that they never return to their lands, and send over their seven finest women as tribute. The Xholx saw sex differently than the Lighst, and sent them warriors— including the general who led them in the battle. Losing her would be a death sentence should the Xholx find themselves in another battle soon after, but they had no choice. While the Lighst ruler wished to add them to his growing harem of defeated foes— the women would make numerous attempts on his life over the following year, costing the man an eye, an ear, a son, and the final straw— his genitalia. They were cast into a cavern and sealed within, left to fend for themselves against whatever monsters lurked in the darkness. The general, Loz, insisted that they wander to the core of the caverns— rather than try to escape through the entrance. They wandered deeper and deeper for a week, subsisting off insects found within. Only one monster dwelled in the dark, which was killed without major injuries. As the prisoners continued deeper, the air around them got thicker, like a fog— but it felt more viscous than that, as if they were treading through mud made air. Yet something compelled them to continue— a light in the distance.
Nahk-tih-yool
War in the east
Louh has attempted on three occasions to invade Noktyoul, believing the ruins to possess alchemical knowledge long since past. They were right. Riding their hulking heul into battle, Louh's forces would find the beasts degenerated into the original animals used to create the amalgams. Similarly, their alchemical grenades failed. While a few Noktyoul soldiers fell to them, others only suffered a few moments of the potion's effects— which were reversed soon after. Dust, plants, and water used to create the concoctions fell to the ground beside them. And then Noktyoul's forces began their counterattack.Our alchemy has no effect— yet their armaments fly freely to rain death upon us all. Forgive me, for I must flee.After the third attempted invasion, a peace treaty was signed— and has been upheld since.
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Amazing as always! Love the dark and brutal imagery surrounding the the seven worms. They really are the highlight of the article. Before I move on I wanted to point to a couple things I noticed. "had warred with other groups in the badlands over even the smallest of oases throughout their history. over even the smallest of oases throughout their history. "While the Lighst had won, they still did not have enough water" On these two, the word "had" is a bit redundant. No big deal if its for flow, but if you removed it, the sentence is unchanged. It took me a moment to realize you pluralized oasis. Freaked me out for a moment XD "As they came close the skin along their frontmost segments peeled" Comma after close I think. Like I said, the seven worms are my favorite bit. Their baddass entry into the story is well done and I love how important they become once hosts to the worms. Everything is well written and kept my attention throughout. Also loved grubs. It made me laugh. Now the timeline is awesome, I'm curious about the ending though. This mysterious howl... What happened? I thumbed back through and couldn't find anything. how ominous.
Thank you for the feedback! Yeah the had just flows better imo. Oases is a fun word for sure. Glad you like the worms because they're my favorite here, too! I ran out of words to elaborate on the howl— but it's meant to be a bit of a loose end. It's an omen for things to come...
o.o ohhhh very nice! Good luck in the competition!