The Maki Roll - Session 9

Don't trust Lyra with pets. I mean, who forgets an entire living fish in their backpack. Also, Irene isn't great at driving. These sisters are really good at making me feel less and less confident about our survival.
 
We came across a temple just off the road. Lysander asked if we could stay the night. Well, beats getting shanked by goblins in my sleep again. Even if the food really sucks. Like, sure, your a temple in the middle of the woods, but I'm sure you can do better than gruel. I've made decent food with less equipment, I mean I only had to feed myself and whoever I was travelling with if they supplied the food. I just hope breakfast is even a little better.
 
So uh, I guess we're escorting a goblin? There was a bush. With legs. Weird right? Well it was following us. I tried to talk to it. I mean after throwing a mug at it. That didn't work so I ended up messing around and scaring it a bit more than I should have. But to be fair, it was really funny. Well turns out Lysander can speak goblin, oh and the bush was a goblin using a bush as a disguise. So yeah, we're escorting a goblin now.
 
Turns out, I was supposed to learn a bunch of languages while I was travelling. How the hells do ALL THREE OF THESE PEOPLE KNOW AT LEAST THREE LANGUAGES. Oh yeah let me just stop by the language store and pick up goblin, never know when you might need it right? I've seen the lives these people live. There is no chance they had any time to really learn these languages. They have to be either messing with me, or have some magical ability to pick up languages in a few conversations. I know common, but pretty much everyone does, you kind of have to if you want to talk to like anyone. And I know infernal, because of the whole y'know being a teifling with teifling parents thing.
 
Well that is pretty much seared into my memory now. Very naked, very fast gnome running through the woods. I don't know if that was normal sized but gods his genitals were big. Like almost dragging them along behind him big. His tracks must look like some crazy monsters. Lysander says they were crazy big but I have no frame of reference here. Sample size one. One VERY large sample. The gnome lady that chased after him was trying to get money. Lady I don't know how you're alive, let alone walking, if what I've been told happens does.