Episode 12: Maharlitech Conference

Taela filed an official grievance with the Triple B Guild against the Grave Order. She submitted hedron footage of the Maharlitech incident, documenting the Grave Order's actions and Mycete’s raid on the Returners’ compound, including the theft from Gundar’s library and the death of his librarian, Gymdille Boulderaxe.

As a result of the evidence, the Returners were granted permission to retaliate in kind if the Grave Order interferes again. Gundar submitted a request for compensation for the murder of his librarian. Taela’s footage is now circulating through Guild channels.

Dance of Death Saves Maharlitech Conference

As printed in the Tortoise Tribune, Issue #12

By Verity Spindlebrush

Calamity was barely averted this Prime Day at the Tortoise's Maharlitech Interorbital Convention by the heroic endeavors of the dashing Gundar the Dance of Death and his guilders, JD and the Returners. This intrepid reporter was in attendance, gathering information about the newest in soulforged prosthetics, goblin thunderprism, and gnomish automatons when some nefarious hidden members of Aleph Zero Syndicate smuggled their way into the conference.

They took on the guise of brewers of a new type of Psychic Beer, named Taela's Tea after the fetching young elf archer of the Returners, made with Faewyld techniques and adorned with a risqué portrait of Taela herself. I, myself, had a sample and found the taste alluring—there was a fermented depth of flavor, but an uncomfortable overtone of bitterness.

As I awaited the glorious revelry of psychic exuberance with many of the other convention visitors, the Grave Order came into the exhibition hall. All four death acolytes perused the Maharlitech goods and spoke with the Aleph Zero spies, but did not partake in the tea because they knew it to be foul sabotage!

Luckily, our hero, Gundar the Dance of Death, graced the room with his marbled body and precious beard, followed quickly by the rest of JD and the Returners. They quickly befriended everyone in the room—even the hidden Aleph Zero members, and even drank some of their twisted tea.

Taela confronted them, as she had not let anyone use her name, or her ravishing portrait, or her secret brewing methods. She interrogated the truth out of the smugglers, who pointed their fingers at the Grave Order. Taela confronted Mycete the mushroomancer. Mycete could not endure Taela's righteous words, and offhandedly admitted to stealing both the brewing notes and picture during a recent raid on the Hallway to the Bayani-Sun.

About that time, the innocent beer drinkers began to suffer.

The Taela's Tea served up psychic powers, but painful ones that hurt the drinkers and others with incoherent babbling and painful projected thoughts. One of Jacky Daytona's vampire roommates seemed the least affected, but even his eyes glazed over for a bit before declaring the brew had been poisoned with a hag's spores (not sure how he tasted that).

He and Jackie were also the first to notice the spies had showered a gnomish allosaurus automaton with the skunked beer, and it sprung to life, threatening with a roar to destroy everyone in the room. A room the Grave Order conveniently exited.

Lucky for us all, no sooner did the dinosaur spring to life than Gundar began his irresistible Dance of Death. His mighty, dwarfly thighs overpowered the steel creature and held it with only the heft of his hips. Gundar then began pounding the machine, bending the metal with bare fists. The dino did not know how blessed it was and tried to bite back at brave Gundar, but his hands and hips predicted every move—his fingertips moving perfectly to match every motion, those massive hips pressing deeper 'til the space between them disappeared.

The Aleph Zero trio began to interrupt, but Jacky Daytona whisked away their intentions with the gentle whispering of his sultry saxophone. Some other mechanical construct aided the Returners, and an arrow from Taela ended the mechanical menace before it could suffer another moment without Gundar's touch.

The Aleph Zero group was secured and handed over to soulforged security. The Returners found a note with the spies, detailing further plans in the main hall aided by the Grave Order. Gundar silently slipped away towards the door. A hero’s work knows no rest.