Cave-Hog Cheese

“Smells like a tunnel full of ghosts. Tastes like victory.”
— A Dwarven Proverb

Cave-Hog Cheese is a hard, salty cheese made from the milk of the Groth'harn — the large, tusked swine domesticated by the Dwarves for meat, muscle, and milk. Cave-hog cheese is dense, oily, and powerfully aromatic, with a rind that sweats in warm tunnels and a center that sharpens with age.

Cave-hog milk is rare, difficult to harvest (Groth’harn are not cooperative milkers), and high in fat, making this cheese a luxury among laborers and a crucial ration for long expeditions into the Bloom.

Flavor Profile:
  • Young: Creamy, mild funk, slightly sweet.
  • Aged: Dense, nutty, aggressively pungent with notes of ash, smoke, and bacon.
Popular Uses
  • Melted into Embercrust Rolls
  • Shaved onto Stonelump Stew
  • Paired with Lava Jam and Iron Mead
  • Used as a non-lethal throwing weapon in tavern brawls

Manufacturing process

Instructions

  1. Heat the Milk
    Warm the Groth’harn milk in a thick stone pot over low heat until it’s just shy of steaming (around 35°C / 95°F). Stir slowly clockwise — Dwarves believe counter-clockwise invites spoilage spirits.
  2. Curdle the Beast
    Add the forge-rennet and let the milk sit undisturbed for 45 minutes. A proper curd will be as firm as old boots and slightly yellowed.
  3. Cut and Stir the Curd
    Slice the curd into rough cubes with a hot obsidian blade. Stir gently while raising the temperature to 39°C (102°F). This firms the curds and shrinks them down.
  4. Strain and Press
    Pour curds into a cloth-lined mold and press with heavy stone weights for 6–12 hours. If liquid still drips, it isn’t ready.
  5. Salt and Dry
    Remove the wheel, rub with salt, and place in a drying rack in a warm tunnel. Flip every 8 hours until a firm rind forms (usually 2–3 days).
  6. Age It Right
    Move to a cool, damp chamber for at least 4 weeks (young and squeaky) or up to 2 years (hard and sharp enough to cut through shame). Dwarves often brush the rind with ale or black vinegar during aging for added depth.

Significance

Cultural Notes

  • Apprentice’s Trial: Many young dwarves are taught to care for a wheel of Cave-Hog Cheese for a year — washing, turning, and guarding it from mold-spirits or hungry uncles.
  • Trade Standard: Properly aged wheels are valuable and stamped with guild runes to certify authenticity. Fakes are severely punished.

Item type
Consumable, Food / Drink
Raw materials & Components

Ingredients (Yields one 1.5 kg wheel)

  • 6 liters fresh Groth’harn milk (still warm is best)
  • ¼ tsp forge-rennet (or thistle rennet in a pinch)
  • 2 tsp mined salt (fine cave-salt or smoked brine salt)
  • ½ tsp fermented moldstarter (from previous rind or cave cultures)
  • Optional: Crushed glowpepper seeds or ash-fennel flakes for spice

Tools

  • Heated stone pot or iron cauldron
  • Carved wooden stirring stick (tradition forbids metal touching the curd)
  • Heavy cheesecloth or fungal fiber straining wrap
  • Mold-stone press or carved weight plates
  • Cool aging tunnel or deep cellar



Cover image: by Appy Pie

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