Paperlic

You reek of-- Aha! That's it! That's the answer I've been looking for! By the gods, someone bring me something to write on!
— gnome proving why paperlic is useful
  Ideas do not stop themselves for anything. Whether in the shower, on the road, at the breakfast table, or somewhere actually appropriate for jotting down ideas, the bloody things will swoop out of one's mind and catch one unaware. Too often, people are caught in this situation without any access to writing implements or things to write on.  
Don't let it congeal! by Hanhula (via Midjourney)
In these tragic moments, their beautiful ideas are left to dwindle and fade in the bowels of their poor memory. Such foul occurrence happening in Soniuch Zan is what spawned the invention of paperlic, a now-staple food found within every gnomish home in the small Xin-Jiyan nation.   Paperlic is, put simply, a very well-preserved slab of fruit tar that has been thoroughly doused in special sugars and treatments during the intense process of beating the fruit into shape. Easily-crafted and easily-carried, it makes for a very functional, nutritious food that is high in vitamins, fibres, and sugars. It also functions as paper, as its name might just indicate.   Paperlic is traditionally served wrapped around a liquorice stick that, in a pinch, functions as a completely functional pen, but most regular writing utensils should be functional on paperlic.   It is strongly recommended that children are only permitted to eat paperlic in moderation. They tend to eat too much.

Manufacturing process

It's really not that complicated. You're mostly just squashing and stirring.
— chef
  Creating paperlic has never been much of a challenge. The base ingredients are a fruit, an acidic liquid, sugar, a small array of additives, a quick-absorbing starch, and a spray of kelevnir ointment. Traditionally, blackberries, blueberries, and strawberries are the fruits used, but anything that can be made into jam is a valid choice for paperlic. Chanceberries are considered unwise to use, as their use may colour the paperlic too many different shades, making it difficult to write on.  
The fruits must be blended thoroughly until smooth, and combined with sugar and the acid. Lemon juice is preferred here, as it gives a light tang as well as helping the mixture congeal into a jam. Using more powerful acids may result in unsurprising, inedible, or dangerous paperlic.   When blended, the mixture must then be cooked until thick and jam-like; this is generally done over a stove, and can take anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes depending on the stove's power. It can be done over a campfire, but stirring may need to be far more rigorous to spread heat evenly. As it becomes a jam, all other additives except for the starch must be steadily added into the mixture and stirred in until completely absorbed.   After the mixture has solidified into a jam, it needs to be spread out into the shape of the paper wanted. Those wanting precision may prefer to use molds made for this purpose, but otherwise, simply spreading it across a flat surface is enough as the edges may be trimmed later. It must be spread extremely thinly, as it shall not shrink much.
Mixing & Mashing by Hanhula (via Midjourney)
  This is to ensure the paper is still able to roll, as paper that is too thick or thin would be relatively useless for writing (if still tasty). When spread out, the layers of paperlic must be placed into a hot oven for about three hours.   It is possible to tell that paperlic is done by texture. Correctly-made paperlic should roll off its surface and be relatively tacky to the touch; it should not be soft or brittle. Once it has reached this state, it must be doused in the starch prepared earlier to remove the tackiness from the surface. Finally, for the sole step requiring a specific ingredient, it must be sprayed with kelevnir ointment - something in the odd herb reacts well with the starch and fruit to allow ink to bind with the fruit.   For best responses, please also serve with either a liquorice pen or writing utensil.

History

It's a good thing our climate isn't very hot!
  Paperlic was invented pretty recently in the scheme of things, coming into being only in 5452. It was the genius invention of a particularly frustrated gnome alchemist by the name of Anshi Dopplebee. Anshi was a victim of his own creativity, for the poor lad had been in the midst of developing an especially powerful formula for treating a new stomach virus that had been spreading throughout the south of Soniuch Zan at rapid pace. For just a few minutes, he stepped away from his laboratory and went to make lunch.  
Anshi's Invention by Hanhula (via Midjourney)
As he macerated some blackberries into jam, he was struck by the thought of their medicinal properties - and a lightbulb flickered in his mind. Fruits were the key! Their sugars would work against this virus, the magic he could infuse into them would hold more easily, and then his scone caught fire. It only took a moment to put it out, but that was enough for tragedy to strike.   In that moment, all of his thoughts and ideas for how to combat the virus were evaporated into a fine mist, replaced only by the pang of hunger that strummed at him as he stared at the mess he'd made of his attempt at lunch. Oh, if he'd only had a notebook to hand! He could have jotted down crumbs of his thoughts while handling the flames, and - well, there was an idea.   Preserving fruits by way of jams and the like had been popular for centuries upon centuries. With vitamins being challenging in the winter months, and with fruit expiring so quickly, there had always been a need for preservatives. Anshi had seen versions of these preserved fruits congealed and served in strips.
  Now, if he were to just mix in something to reduce the stickiness, maybe mix in something to help colour absorb...   Within a few weeks of development, Anshi had his prototype of paperlic: a thin slab of blueberries worked with sugars and other substances to form a pale sheet of lightly-coated food. While edible, it worked well in a pinch if inspiration struck - for the mixture of fruit could hold colour from his pens!   Better yet, the preservatives involved were stronger than the standard. His new concoction would last for years, and even when inedible, would simply harden rather than moulding. For those who travelled extensively, a fruit-like treat they could carry with them with them was excellent news.   While he could have made thousands off the recipe, Anshi took a different approach. He spread the recipe far and wide and gave traders instructions on how to procure the ingredients, all the while making sure they knew he'd created the treat in the first place. Thus, as it spread, news of its inventor spread with it. And when Anshi finally completed his blueberry-coated cure for the virus he'd originally been working on, far more knew of him already, and selling his subsequent inventions became a dream. A win for everyone involved!
Blueberry Paperlic by Hanhula (via Midjourney)
Item type
Consumable, Food / Drink
Rarity
Commonplace; everyday staple
I was able to get my dear boy to finally do his homework with paperlic! His schoolmistress was not so impressed when he ate it in front of her the next day.
— grinning mother
 
Late to School by Hanhula (via Midjourney)
 
There's an important lesson to be had with paperlic that they aren't going to teach you in school.   Don't bloody use it for scrolls. Magic scrolls, you dolt.   Magic doesn't play well with all those sugars. Don't blame me when you try it and your Teleport spell sends you blasting into space instead!
— annoyed sorcerer to her apprentice
 
Helper Child by Hanhula (via Midjourney)
 
I'm pretty sure the name is just because it's paper you can lick. Right?
— doubtful elf

Comments

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Jul 9, 2025 10:41 by Keon Croucher

I adore this concept, I simply would love it if this were real. You describe the process in its making so well and convincingly I genuinely wonder if this would work. I might need to try for science O.O could you imagine!   Naturally of course kids can't be trusted to moderate sweets, I like that touch, so true to life. I was a gremlin if 'trusted' to moderate my own intake, that is very real, fantastic. The kids eating their own homework is comedic and wonderous and I can honestly picture it :P Most definitely adding this to my collection both for the amusement of the idea and potentially for later....experimentation.

Keon Croucher, Chronicler of the Age of Revitalization
Jul 9, 2025 10:46 by Han

(The secret is that it absolutely will work, it's just how you make fruit leathers/rollups/fruit by the foot with some tweaking. I'm a sneaky shit sometimes.)   Thank you for being so lovely once again!


welcome to my signature! check out istralar!
Jul 9, 2025 16:29 by Enoris Leinwand

Now I just MUST have it, it's sooooo cool

Jul 11, 2025 13:18 by Dr Emily Vair-Turnbull

I don't know if paperlic would help me with ideas because I think I would just eat it all. XD

Emy x
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