Professor Alistair Wickleset
Berrin Wickleset (a.k.a. Ace)
Berrin Wickleset was born among the floating platforms and crystal-lit corridors of the city of Galca, raised beneath drifting gardens and enchanted walkways where magic hummed as constantly as wind. From an early age, he showed a talent for spatial reasoning and arcane pattern recognition, the sort of mind that noticed when things didn’t quite line up. While other students reveled in spectacle, Berrin gravitated toward structure: why enchantments held, how levitation matrices compensated for turbulence, why some magical effects drifted over time while others remained stubbornly fixed.
He eventually earned a teaching post at one of Galca’s arcane schools, lecturing on theoretical cartography and unstable spatial systems. His work focused on mapping places that resisted being mapped; floating districts, experimental spell zones, planar overlaps, and enchanted environments that refused to behave consistently. Among his peers, he was respected, if not beloved. His lectures were precise, demanding, and intolerant of sloppy thinking. He believed magic was beautiful because it worked, not because it surprised.
During a sanctioned research excursion to catalog a Fey-touched wood in the Vauxtara Woodland, Berrin encountered an Archfey, a being whose influence thrived not on awe or terror, but on irritation. It presented itself cheerfully, perched atop a stump, and told a knock-knock joke so catastrophically bad that it barely qualified as humor. Berrin did not laugh. Instead, he explained why the joke failed. He spoke at length. About rhythm. About expectation. About structure. About why humor depended on tension and release, and why the Archfey's punchline collapsed under its own inadequacy. To Berrin, this was not cruelty. It was pedagogy. To the Archfey, it was unforgivable.
The Archfey’s response was swift, theatrical, and devastatingly petty.
Rather than curse Berrin with death, madness, or ruin, he was cursed with inconvenience. The world would never quite cooperate with him again. Nature would mark him as though he were perpetually struggling. His sense of direction would betray him with absolute confidence. Mundane mechanisms would hesitate and twitch in his presence, not enough to destroy, but enough to erode patience and reputation.
Berrin returned to Galca changed.
At first, he tried to ignore the effects. Then he tried to compensate. Then he tried to explain them away. But the city noticed. Students whispered. Colleagues complained about malfunctioning equipment. His once immaculate appearance degraded into a constant state of weathered disarray. He arrived late, muddy, or inexplicably lost despite being escorted. Within a year, his name-Berrin Wickleset, once associated with rigorous scholarship-had become a quiet liability.
That was when he made a decision.
He began introducing himself as Alistair Wickleset.
It was not a false name, merely one he had never used before — a spare, human-leaning name he had once considered too theatrical for academic life. Now it served a purpose. “Berrin” belonged to the man he had been; the professor of Galca, the name attached to published papers, chalkboards, and lecture halls. “Alistair” could belong to the man who survived what came next. It was a way to protect his past from his present, to ensure that whatever embarrassment followed would not fully eclipse the work he had already done. Shortly after, he was quietly removed from his teaching post.
Rather than collapse, Alistair adapted.
Cut off from clean laboratories and institutional patience, he turned his theory outward. If the world insisted on interfering, he would engineer around it. He began building tools meant not for elegance, but for resilience. His most enduring creation was an arcane umbrella: part focus, part shield, part artillery. It seemed to be the only object that was able to resist both grime and Fey interference. Out of necessity rather than ambition, he became an Artillerist.
Eventually, Galca became too small for him. He left not in disgrace, but in resignation, drifting downward from the clouds into a wider world that was no more forgiving — but no more judgmental, either. Now he wanders under the name Alistair Wickleset, answering to “Ace” when spoken to kindly. He looks like a hardened survivor, though he insists he is not. He appears dangerous, though he would prefer tea and a quiet workspace. He gets lost constantly, accumulates dirt effortlessly, and carries an umbrella to help keep him clean.
Physical Description
Special abilities
"I'm going to make the world notice you. Every step will feel right, every tool will hesitate, and the dirt and birds will always remember and know where you've been."
The Mark of the Unweathered
The curse does not create filth; it redirects inevitability. Wherever dirt could end up, it chooses him. Wherever birds fly over him, he's a target. When dust or pollen blows, it's always in his direction. Soil splatters upwards, leaves catch in his clothes, and grime accumulates faster than it should. The effect is strongest outdoors and weakest under deliberate cover, which is why the umbrella matters so deeply. Socially, the mark reshapes perception: strangers read him as battered, hardened, desperate, or seasoned by hardship. The world tells a story about him whether he likes it or not.
The Wayward Certainty
This curse severs intuition from truth. Alistair’s internal sense of direction remains confident, calm, and persuasive while being consistently wrong. He does not feel lost; he feels correct. His steps carry conviction even when leading astray, and hesitation only sets in when contradicted by external reference. The cruelty of the curse lies in its subtlety. Maps still work. Signs still point. Advice can still be followed. But left to instinct alone, he will always choose the poorer path.
The Murmur of Imperfect Things
Within Alistair’s presence, mundane mechanisms lose their certainty. Gears hesitate, locks resist at the wrong moment, springs misjudge their tension, and precision devices fall slightly out of rhythm. Nothing shatters. Nothing catastrophically fails. Everything simply becomes annoying. The effect is limited to non-magical constructs, as if enchantment itself acts as insulation against Fey interference. To Alistair, the curse manifests as a constant sense that the world is out of sync, a low-level vibration of unreliability. To the public, it looks like coincidence, until it happens again...and again...and again.
Mental characteristics
Accomplishments & Achievements
Before his curse, Alistair was a respected professor in Galca, teaching theoretical cartography and spatial anomalies at one of the city’s prestigious arcane schools. He contributed to early mapping models used for floating cities and unstable planar regions. After his fall from academic grace, his greatest achievement became survival through adaptation. He reinvented himself as an Artillerist, developing a unique umbrella-based arcane focus that functions as both protection and artillery. His work bridges the gap between academic theory and field practicality, earning him quiet respect among artisans and adventurers alike.
Failures & Embarrassments
His most infamous failure was his encounter with an Archfey when he responded to a Fey joke with a detailed critique rather than laughter. The resulting curse ruined his academic reputation and forced his departure from Galca's orderly halls. Since then, he has endured countless public embarrassments: getting lost while giving confident directions, appearing far tougher than he is due to constant grime, and being blamed for mechanical mishaps simply because he was nearby. Each incident chipped away at his former arrogance.
Mental Trauma
The curse profoundly altered Berrin’s relationship with control. Years of being unable to trust his senses, his environment, or even clean air have left him with a low-level, constant vigilance. He is not broken, but he is tired in a way that sleep does not fix. The experience humbled him, stripping away certainty and replacing it with cautious acceptance. While he no longer panics, he also rarely feels truly at ease.
Intellectual Characteristics
Alistair is analytical, methodical, and deeply curious. He is empathetic in practice, if not always in language. While once dismissive of perspectives he deemed illogical, he has learned that lived experience does not always obey theory. He is less confident than he once was, but wiser for it. His intellect now serves understanding rather than superiority, though old habits still surface when he’s stressed.
Morality & Philosophy
Alistair believes the world is not malicious, merely careless. He does not see himself as cursed by evil but inconvenienced by a universe that enjoys irony. His philosophy centers on adaptation over domination: rather than fighting chaos directly, he builds around it. He values responsibility, mutual support, and incremental improvement.
Homebrew
Umbrella of Applied Defiance
Spellcasting Focus (Shield)
Varies Artificer Requires Attunement
Arcane Focus
The umbrella functions as an arcane focus for Artificer spells. While holding it, the wielder gains a +1 bonus to spell attack rolls.
Defensive Canopy
While the umbrella is open and you are not incapacitated, you gain a +1 bonus to AC against ranged weapon attacks originating from above or at long range. This bonus represents deflection, not a force field, and does not stack with a shield.
Integrated Eldritch Cannon (Artillerist Feature)
When you create your Eldritch Cannon, it manifests as this umbrella rather than a separate object. Flavor-wise, the effects emerge from the canopy ribs or the reinforced tip rather than an external barrel.
The umbrella can be configured normally as:
- Flamethrower
- Force Ballista
- Protector
Personal Indignity Mitigation
The umbrella is enchanted to repel mundane filth. While open, it prevents the wearer from being soiled by rain, mud splash, dust fall, pollen clouds, and similar environmental grime from above. This does not negate magical effects or area hazards, and it does not prevent bird droppings entirely; it merely blocks them while actively held and open.
Arcane Reinforcement
The umbrella counts as a magical object for the purposes of resisting the effects of Fey interference, curses that target mundane items, and similar narrative effects.
Melee Use (Last Resort)
The umbrella can be used as an improvised melee weapon dealing 1d6 bludgeoning damage (versatile 1d8).
This reinforced umbrella is constructed from Chronorite infused ribs, alchemically waterproof fabric, and an internal arcane focusing chamber. Subtle runes are stitched along the seams and etched into the shaft. When inactive, it functions as a mundane umbrella and walking stick.
| Type | Damage | Damage | Range |
|---|---|---|---|
| Simple Melee | 1d6 / 1d8 | Bludgeoning |
Weight: 7 lbs

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