Heron Valnor

I'll try to keep this short, writing a journal brings back some rather unpleasant memories...       Something's been bugging me ever since we left that wizard's lair and made me feel kind of guity.....well.....no.........not like this......this is not a good way to sart this journal. Even more days have passed and the sea keeps getting calmer and calmer. I don't know why but for some reason i find this place very soothing, calming, even inviting but not necessarily in a bad manner. Hmm, i'm either fucked in the head or I just simply find these fragments of memory and life scattered around in such a chaotic way to be extremely calming, hmm, probably both....I really can't explain this and probably it doesn't even need an explanation, it just is.   Recently, Nixie came up with the bright idea of organizing a tournament and a party to keep the crew in high morale and have a good time in general. I loved that and I was incredibly excited, more people to fight and more oportunities to evolve. People started getting ready for the tournament early, all of them were excited and that made me happy. I love seeing an honest smile on a human's face, it's countagious hehe. Anyhow, the peace was suddenly broken by none other than Pullius, ugh, what on God's earth happened now. Apperently something was going on with the Black Sylph. What? ermmmm......nooooo........i don't think that i need to say whether something good or bad has happened, i already made myself clear by saying that Pullius rushed the top deck to tell us somethig happened, it was just them two in the room. To be honest i was expecting the worst, i nearly shat my bloody pants, and trust me, those are not easy to clean. When we all got down there we saw something disturbing and yet very honest. The Black Sylph was deperately trying to either tell us smth or the poor thing was simply trying to breathe, but one thing was certain, on e thing that surprised us all. She wanted a hug from none other than our dear friend Talion. I was left speechless. Why? Why would she, what happened, how can she be so pure and innocent and yet so wise and strong.....hmm....i like that. Nope, it was just cute, that's why i liked it. I know Talion can be a bit disoriented, but he is a good man, yes an excruciatingly painful man to deal with, but a good man for sure, he just needs guidance, like all of us do. When they hugged, yet another piece of her body fell and vanished into thin air....It saddens me to see her like this but it only motivates me to help her more. Also, friendly reminder.....just GO TALK TO HER you big dummy.......why am i so scared to do that.....   Before moving on, i would like to point out that i finally got a chat with Tallion and expressed my worries regarding his managing skills and leadership skills. I was very scared not to upset him because that was not my goal, i didn't want to "steal" his role, i just wanted to take the helm for a little while untill he is back on his feet and capable. I was happy to see he was not mad. We then decided to go and tell the party about what we discussed. To my surprise Talion was happy to announce that we should no longer call him Talion, but Pullius ( oh the irony, the throbbing staff of the magic men with daddy and kinky demons issues ). It was extremely random but after a few seconds i understood his intentions on rebuilding his character so i was glad to hear he was doing something and working on himself. Others on teh other hand did not take the news to lightly, especially Eve again and she is right, why the fuck are you spouting random stuff at such random times, and also i was expecting to talk about something else. It doesn't matter though, we told them about our talk and they told me and Pullius they need a few time to sit on it. Very normal answer, agh, i was just as random as he was too, so i shouldn't be talking. It happened though, it's in the back now and the result was actually very satisfying.   Coming back to the big event of the day. It was a contest of fist fighting separated into three categories depending on the side of the participants: small, medium and large. Pretty simple, right? Nixie along with Drenizek and Xebec were all part of the jury and the rest of us joined one of the previously mentioned categories. Tallion and my good friend Bart were put in the small category, and me with Verfys got into the large group. The medium group was won by Gerki, didn't seem too hard for him. Next one to fight was tha large category. The frist fight was between Verfys and the ship's quartermaster, a very nice fight, i enjoyed it quite a lot, of course, i rooted for Verfys and she won. I was proud. Then it was me versus Dillen, well, what can i say, all this bullkiness made me forget how to dance..... :)). No problem though, i can learn to dance in this body too. It's just muscle memory. Anyhow, i loved my fight with him, it was very funny. I bet we looked like to fucktards trying to grab each other's dick while having a seizure at some point :)))). Wow, what an image. It wasn't a very long fight but he was very swift and fast and it took me a while to take me down, maybe before being able to dance again i should train some more in this new body. After a few other fights, there was the final....me vs Verfys. Damn i felt weird. I didn't want to hurt her, but i didn't want to hold back to insult her either so i just went with the flow.....hoping i don't hit her somewhere unpleasant for both of us, i'm pretty sure i dodged a bullet a few times there....phew. Itr wasn't a hard fight to win, but i did get kind of sweaty. Sweatier than the fight with Dillen.....way more sweaty.....i wonder what this sweat will lead to.   Now, for the main event, the sausage party, i'll just jump to the final, it was glorious, i loved it, i really really hope i see them fight again, i was laughing so hard and was so proud of Bart at the same time. A grand final in the small category for sure, in one corner of the ring the crybaby and in the opposite corner the simping singer. It was a fight of ladders, belts, wits, tears of joy and frustration, and of course, a lot of fucking confusion. Just wonderful, who said chaos is not beautiful must have only studied the chaos inside his head, heh, trust me, it cand get pretty hot in there in terms of chaos. Towards the end of the fight, something happend, Tallion literally projected Bart with immense and unnerving power right into the mast almost knocking him out. And just like that the fight stopped. We rushed our champions to the lower deck in one of our quarters and a very serious discussion ensued. Pulius fucked up again, but it's fine, we all do mistakes. Yes some were mad at him especially Eve, but we soon came to realize that being angry at him doesn't help at all, instead we should reassure him and support him in this fight. I believe Axiol was its name, weird name for a tiny fucker with daddy issues that comes from the pit, but even so he is strong, and Pullius needs help from us to get stronger, i trust him, i really do, sometimes he just disappoints me, but i still care for the thick headed bastard. After a rather weird talk about how it was not okk to give in to his fury and Pullius being ashamed and asking for forgiveness, me and Verfys went back up to calm the restless spirits of out dear sailors. We managed to calm them down and they understood what we meant, they are good people and i know they will be able to overcome this small impediment. After all, if you are scared and don't trust the guy to be better, then u are only putting yourself at risk at the same time if you think about it. If their energy towards him is negative, then they are only working against themselves since they are scared he might lose control. The only logical way to solve this is for them to be helpful and understanding with him so that he doesn't lose control.   Everyone went back to their joyful evening and the fight between Bart and Pullius was settled with a good old fashioned rock, paper, scissors. Pullius won and moved into the final stage of the competition olongside me and Gerki. The crew decided that the final winner will be decided with a contet of drinking and riddle answering. It was nice, i liked the riddle a lot and the beer was good too. I don't know if it was good because it was carefully brewed or just because i was surrounded by joy and good people, probably the latter, but it didn't matter to me. Somehow i managed to win this one too, i got kind of lucky too with some answers and won the big price, a well cooked portion of ribs carefully grilled by our lovely cook. I only took one rib and shared the rest with the others, it was a victory for everyone, not just for me, because everyone deserved it ( and of course i saved some for Artie ). The night kept going at its own pace untill pretty much everyone got very drunk. Nothing disturbed our peace, but unfortunately the poor Eve fell in the water when prince charming went to talk to her. Me and Bart quickly dived into the dark water and brought her back to the ship. We gave her a new pairs of clothes so she wouldn't catch a cold and then she went to sleep. I stayed a bit more for a couple more drinks with Xebec and Lavk'u and little chat and then i went back to bed. I was a bit sad that i wouldn't hear my dear Bart's mumbling, but eh, he made a very good decision. He never ceases to impress me and he is a very determing and strong guy, i really love him a lot, he reminds me of Lomnim and he is also like a brother to me. They all are family and i shall protect them with my life, that's the thought i went to sleep with. Also i forgot to mention, but i finally manned up and went to talk al ittle to the black sylph, i introduced her to Artie who seemed to feel very calm around her and event went to sleep beside her, heh lucky guy. Coming back to reality, i felt vey happy after talking to her and quickly got back on the deck leaving her with Artie, i didn't want to bother her too much.   In the morning we gathered so they could give me a conclusion to my proposal, i was glad to hear they trust Tallion, i really hope this and yesterday's events will shake him to his core and make him realize it's time to take control of his life. I will do my best to help him and guide him with his decisions the best i can.   Well, i really didn't want to write this much, it reminds me of my younger days and the journals i used to keep, swallowed by the unforgiving fire.....but it's fine, i can overcome this fear and face it straight in the eyes and eventually defeat it, after all, i always liked writing journals. Ah God damn it, i just remembered last night's dream.....my brain.....aaaaaarghh...not cool, u are supposed to be my friend. Sometimes i wonder where these vivid very imaginative and detailed dreams come from. Ughhhh.....i need to go change the sheets again before going to the training on the deck.   Untill next time, not so horny today because i don't like it BRAIN!!!! out......even so, i can't really tell if the girl from the dream is the one from back in the fighting pit from that night and it bothers me....okk, i said stop!