Ender Courting Rituals

An Enderian partnership is often precluded by or initiated alongside a shared project. By working together on a mutually stimulating project, there is a deep connection that forms over time as the participants learn how each other work, how they learn, and how they adapt, as well as how they work together.   Courting Gifts   Courting gifts are typically gifts of time and energy, taking form in as many ways as there are relationships. However, this does not mean physical gifts are not valued; on the contrary, they are valued higher because of their rarity.   Materials are precious, and so is time, so if someone gives you a material gift that is not only functional (as that is the more important quality) but also beautiful? That is a phenomenal courting gift, and generally a sign of great respect and adoration.   Ideal Relationship Qualities   In an ideal relationship, there is balance. Not completing you, because you are a whole person on your own, but they complement you. They push you to be better, and you push them. Growing together and looking forward to growing together is the ideal.   A good sign of a growing relationship is sharing new knowledge and/or expertise with them. Teaching the person you're courting something you hold dear is a level of vulnerability that is rarely beaten by other activities.   If they learn something new specifically to make their partner something? Marriage material. The desire to learn and grow is brought on by knowing their partner and wanting to please them, and that is a sign of a deep relationship.   Rejected Courting   When rejecting a courting, there is typically a reason why. Whatever the reason is, it should be shared with the courter and the decision respected. Most rejections are due to a difference in goals, a difference in progression, or a difference in mentality so core it cannot be brushed aside, though more shallow reasons are also to be respected.   When an attempt to court is rejected, the courter is likely to take the rejection harshly. Most reasons for rejection are respected and not pushed, but some reasons are so personal they stab more than sting, regardless of intent or delivery. Those who were courting out of genuine interest in the other tend to take a while to recover, and will focus on other things until the pain passes or heals.   Relationship Issues   Most relationship problems, Enderians believe, come from some variation of miscommunication before assumption of incompatibility. When an issue is identified, it is thought about and discussed over time between the partners until a conclusion is drawn, resulting in either a solution or a separation. Most healthy relationships find solutions together and work towards mutual understanding, which deepens their bond if they make it through.   However, if the rift is too deep to mend or cross, most partners separate with goodwill and well wishes moving forward, and will still remain in touch after the fact. A person with that deep of an impact on someone is not simply forgotten or tossed aside, and will continue to be respected unless given reason to not.