The actual foes

My experience with abuse and assault of all kinds. Read with caution, even though nothing is written in graphic details.

The actual foes - an Avoranican poem

The internal conclusion
of what’s happening inside
is confusion
and I’d be the dying bride.

The confusion,
the names they throw at me
The conclusion,
the fact that is obvious to see.

I’m not me, but still not you,
I’m not free to be,
compared to what you do.

I’m not the one, and you cannot choose it
I cannot run,
and I will lose it
The conclusion will be.

The internal emotions,
for the sake of feeling
I despise it, why not put them in the ceiling?

I was wrong, I’m confused,
I’m just held, beaten, and used.

The internal conclusion,
of what’s happening outside,
Is the inner confusion,
which I’m forced to hide.

They used me because they could,
They refused to let me go,
I cried even if I should
have tried to escape the foe.

But no, they were so many,
and I cried myself to a soothing state
In the end it doesn’t matter
They were too many with a lot of hate.

Continue to hold me down,
continue to enter me by force.
continue to hit and harm
I do not trust anyone any more, of course!

They said I shouldn’t this,
They said, I shouldn’t that,
They say I’m that just one of those hoes,
when they were the actual foes!