41.7 Running Towards

General Summary

Day 685

It's like Liliales took a gap year to bum around and learn stuff. He'll always be my little boy - it would take an enormous upheaval for him to surpass my experience and knowledge. It's just like when I went to the Academy and had to be apart from Mistress - growth she didn't experience with me, but that didn't take me away from her at all.   Below deck, Detoura is groggy but awake, and Qishali is writing in a notebook while keeping an eye on a sleeping Qing Chen. She leaves me to my conversation...one that I'm quite apprehensive about. Fortunately, Ausha joins me for support. I just want to know how he experienced it...before deciding what to do or how to feel. If the Dream represented us unfairly or untruthfully and he chose to betray us, it's not the same as betraying us in reality. And as Ausha says - does it even matter? A dream is a dream, and we could just ignore that it happened at all. Still - I would want to know his fears even if they had nothing to do with us.   He's wakeable...and seems surprised to be awake, unshackled. I confirm that Liliales told us what happened, but Magdalena hasn't been told yet and I don't intend to tell her until our coalition of apprentices can figure something out. We tell him quite honestly that it doesn't matter what he did in a dream. Mostly, I ask for context to understand the events of his dream.   He tells us that he's something of a runaway in multiple ways - he ran from his family to join his sect, then from the sect to join his order, then from his order to wander the world. He is running away from inheriting his father's position and being a chosen successor. He stood out wherever he went, being one of the best wherever he went and achieving impressive things amongst his siblings, his sect, and the order.  

All roads lead back to one place. Whenever I got too far along the road, I'd run away from it, because I know where that road is going.

  Qing Chen tells us that his worst nightmares are about losing his ability to run away and not having a choice about following in his father's footsteps. For him, a lack of choice is entangled with being a Demon King...it is not just a title or position that can be held by anyone. A Demon King is a king first, before they are anything else. The position comes with power and strength that exists at a higher level than any other demon could obtain, and the power comes with fragments of will. Some fragments are from previous Demon Kings and it changes the fundamental nature of their own will.   When a person is selected as someone who might inherit a Demon King's legacy, a seed of a Dragon King is placed in them. The nightmare, more accurately, is that Qing Chen's sleeping seed will wake and grow. A Demon King could plant multiple seeds, but Qing Chen's father has only given one, to his son, and so it is somewhat inevitable.   Personally, it sounds like a very interesting problem statement: There is potential buried inside him that he wants to get rid of. He has been pursuing this problem for decades as he learned in his sect, joined his order to try and amass enough magical power to remove it himself until he started growing powerful enough that he feared his seed might awaken by itself.  

Knowing that I have this...and that if it awakens, it will distort me...can you bear to keep me around?

  Ausha and I both laugh. He looks so mournful, and in such a comedic way if it can be separated from the real tragedy of his situation. He seems genuinely surprised that we would fight for him just like we fought for Trillium.  

You've been adopted. Are you going to run away again? No...no you're not running away. You've been running toward: Toward the sect that could give you what you needed, toward the order that could give you what you needed, toward the rest of the world to find the next thing.

  He sighs and makes ready to go apologize to Liliales for the cruelty experienced in the Dream, even if he was warped and distorted. And Ausha and I both push him to tell Magdalena about his concerns so that we can help instead of leaving it unspoken and unattended. She certainly knows about the seed and can imagine the problems it might incur, but he needs to take the first step towards solving his problem.   With Qing Chen set to his tasks, Ausha and I think about the risk factor of the Demon Emperor dying...as Void said he likely would. I wonder if Qing Chen's father might become the Emperor...and thus trigger Qing Chen's seed. The possibility is a problem for later discussion, I think. For now, Ausha and I would like to go wander the market a bit with Liliales and his new fiancée!   On deck, Qing Chen is eating while Liliales and Skyen spar in a way that is absolutely weird and consistent with his magical growth. He has several illusions and all of them switch their blade hand regularly, making it nearly impossible to predict where the real weapon is. It is a distinctly mage-like way of fighting, and I can see that he's figured out so much by himself. Fortunately for Skyen, the illusions still don't mimic the smell of a living thing. It's an impressive rematch, but Liliales still hasn't surpassed him. Qing Chen, at least, looks a little relieved and surprised, so I surmise they already had their conversation.   When Qishali joins us, she comments that Liliales is holding back some of his abilities because they're just not safe for friendly combat. It makes me think of Lyssa and her red lightning, and Qishali shows us her green lighting along with purple, red, and a pure white. I explain the Lyssa is also not a mage, but an archer.  

She has a lightning bow?

  Qishali summons a thin blade made of purple lightning - evidently she can conjure weapons when they're needed. And then she calls an end to the sparring match so that the four of us can go out shopping.   Shopping with Qishali is a lovely experience - she is knowledgeable and helpful and we make plenty of good purchases. She also points out places selling 'spirit cores' - condensed spirits, some of whom were elders like Qishali herself. This trade is evidently allowed in the kingdoms, and the spirit folk seem completely at ease with it. It surprises me to hear Liliales ask her if someone (the trader) needs to meet an unfortunate end. It is so at-odds with my family's usual practice of addressing problems at the root rather than the surface. Qishali calms him as well, saying that they knew it would be like this, that not everyone even sees spirits as people.   It's worst than slavery, Liliales tells me when I point out that it's a 5-10 year project to end slavery in Brighton. Becoming a spirit core means stripping away anything of what the spirit was as a conscious person and makes them into pure energy. It takes torture to produce such a thing. In some ways, I tell him, it makes the problem easier - it's not like that's a booth full of slaves that could be rescued. What's done is done, and changing anything about it means aiming higher.   But Liliales says that he just wants to leave the South so that Qishali can be around people who view her as a person - she has told him not to try changing it, but that could also be her way of keeping him safe. My wisest advice is to simply wait for a few centuries and see how they feel about it then.   Elsewhere in the market there are items that seem somewhat Dwarven in their importance. The items themselves are quite simple but they are treasured because they were owned by some hero or important figure. Most are clearly just marketing tactics, but some are actually fateful. Ausha picks out a fate-imbued bracelet with red and blue gems as a gift for Yneir.   I, myself, acquire two local instruments (a digeridoo and a hand pan) and some pigments that use ingredients imbued with the local magic. I also buy some spiritual paintings:

• A River vista for Trillium
• A nighttime River vista for Andstella

I go looking for some seeds and find that there is a booming market for herbs of various ages (older herbs that have grown by the River for hundreds of years). The merchant is very confused when I tell him I don't care how old something is, just that I want variety. Nevertheless, it's easy to find what I'm looking for.   There is also a book market! I find a beginner textbook of ritual magic, clearly pre-owned multiple times. As I tell Liliales - never buy a book firsthand. The margin notes from previous owners are often just as valuable as the author's words.